The past year has been extremely tough for me and for my children. I started this blog as an outlet for myself and also for others, widows or not. I hope it appeals to many in various shades of life.
My first widow reached out to me this past week and with her permission I want to share some of her story. It truly helps put things into perspective.
"Like all young widows, my story sucks. I met Jim when I was 21, and we dated for 3 years. We got married when I was 24. He was a wonderful, popular and well-loved teacher at a local high school. He had always wanted jetskis and in January, 2015 I finally agreed and we bought a pair. That was the biggest mistake of my life.
On a beautiful day in March, we took them to the lake to ride. I had my daughter, then 6 years old on the one I was driving and Jim had my son, then 10 years old with him. Sadly we did not stay together while riding. A little while after beginning to ride, Jim and JP, my son crashed into a dock at a high speed. Jim was killed instantly. A doctor and a retired marine saw the crash and pulled my son from the water. He had a severe brain injury. He was airlifted to a regional hospital where 6 pieces of his broken skull were removed. I did not learn of the accident until after I searched the lake for 2 hours and an officer finally came to find me.
Miraculously, JP survived. He was in an induced coma for 2 weeks. Upon waking, he was unable to move his left side, speak, or eat. Eventually, he was transported to a larger children's hospital where we stayed for inpatient intensive rehabilitation for 2 weeks. After completing rehab, he underwent surgery to replace his skull pieces last May with 30 titanium plates and screws. After much therapy, he is perfect! He is in 6th grade and making all A's. He can walk, talk and do everything any other child can do except play sports. He takes medication for seizures but he has not had one in a month! My daughter, Sarah Marie is now 7 and JP is now 11. Missing their daddy is heartbreaking, but we are surviving just like you. I struggle with the why, how and what the hell am I going to do! One of the worst parts as you know is the loneliness and quite honestly the loss of a companion when everyone around me has one. I had a happy marriage with zero regrets except for that last awful day. Jim was the greatest husband, dad and best friend in the world."
What I am learning through this treacherous journey is that we all have a story. We all suffer through trials and tribulations in our lives and we are all seeking a similar goal. To enjoy life. After Holly shared her tragedy I felt fortunate. My children were not in an accident. I did not watch either of them fight for their lives as I stumbled through my grief over losing Daniel. After she shared her very personal journey with me she wrote, "I try hard to laugh every day, but in my mind, there is an enormous amount of profanity running through in ridiculous combinations!" I believe we should all seek to laugh every day. Live freely and love deeply. I am sending love and support to Holly and her family and am grateful that she chose to share her story with me and now with all of us.
Meet the Author (me)
Driven by a need to help others. I have known from a young age that this is what I wanted to do. This is my very real, somewhat sarcastic, look into my newfound widowhood. I hope this site will help you as much as it helps me.